Life is a combinations of things that you chose, not chose but have to live with. What a pointless statement to start a new post. That is my perspective because I always felt that life is a bit overly structured for me as a Singaporean. I grew up in a family that did not like to deviate from the status quo, and that helped us stay on track according to the “system”. Now that I have worked closed to a decade, I feel that this life might not be what I want for the long run. It’s nice that I have a stable job and income and it was not easy to come by. But I do feel that life is kind of pointless at times. I am not particularly good at anything but I do have had experience obsessing about things like losing weight or working in an extreme way. In today’s post, I will share a bit about why questioning about life has benefited me or sustained me.

I need to know why my life is like that

To be honest, I wasted a lot of my life questioning about things. In short, I do not like accepting things just because thats how things were. I want to be different not because I wanted to be special but because I feel that the norm is usually the easiest way to live and my mind just refuses to believe that the best way to live is the easiest way. I go back and forth about this throughout my life but I think I never really accepted the norm and I think it makes my life a bit more bearable.

Wants and needs blurs as I grow older

Okay this part is a little bit more interesting. I do feel that wants help us work harder in life because the power of desire is extremely motivating especially when I had so little when I was younger. As I entered adulthood, I really focus on achieving my needs and postponed my wants to achieve bigger wants at a later age. Thats one of my biggest regret thus far, because of delaying my wants, I feel really deprived and it made my achievements thus far a reminder of my mistakes of deploying my wants. My biggest lesson so far is that if you delay your wants, your needs and wants will soon converge to compensate for the deprivation that was self-imposed.

I do not want to regret when I am old

I guess this should be somewhat common for many people. We all question or at least think before we decide because we do not want to regret. While this is nothing new, I think we are all at risk or forgetting this fact because life is just so draining such that we forget that we might regret if we did not spend sufficient energy to question about life. In summary, life is made of time, opportunities and decisions. As such, if we do not decide well and use our opportunities availed to us, we will also inevitably lose time which is arguably the only thing that we can cannot get more of.

Closing Thoughts

It is funny because all I have written today is a justification to think or overthink and I am not going to life that it feels like a waste of time. That said, time is never wasted if you are doing something that we feel is important at some point in your life. Perhaps it will be more helpful if we acted more bravely instead of just pondering about life and potential outcomes. Only God knows 🙂